Tuesday, June 30, 2009 - 10:47
Today's Horoscope
Health :
Tomatoes and cucumbers are filled with vitamin C which fights viruses. Vitamin C is also an excellent antioxydant which helps to fight aging.
Love :
You have been telling your partner that he is distant. Ever since you have been feeling more passionate, you are having a hard time accepting that your partner is more reserved.
Money :
You should not overpass your capabilities. Certain purchases are not wise at this time.
Work :
You will have a reason to fight for something at work. You went through a lot to have others accept your ideas.
I just thought this was funny ... especially the Love.
So I've come to terms with the fact that I won't be taking my trip to Quebec City in Aug. Payment is due July 7, and there is no way that I'll have that money ($300) in a week ... unless somebody wins the lotto and donates it to me! What are the odds, right? Then I'd have to bust my butt for the plane fare, and the hotel costs ... and would come home to having to bust my butt for rent ... and a security deposit as I plan on moving for Sept 1. *sigh* It breaks my heart to not go, but I've had so much heart break lately, that's it's fairly numb. And it's something that I know I have to do ... which is easier to bear than being told that I can't do it.
Strange but true ...
Besides, I'm sure that The Shepherd would like to be paid somewhere in there, yeah? Damn, but the loss of that extra $800 has just thrown everything off course. I detest scratching for cash and coming up short. Especially when I was depending on something that, when it finally arrived, didn't meet my expectations. Still, I think I'm better off than I was when I was on my own before. Jade-less though I be, I have a better circle of friends this time. And for the first time, Family is backing me up. Family other than my parents. It's a heady, wonderful feeling.
So, I'm struggling, but I know that things will get better.
Sweet Dreams!
Thoughts, worries, dreams, therapies and conspiracy theories ... oh, yeah, and venting. Or is that part of the therapy?
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Monday, June 29, 2009
Faded Roses
Monday, June 29, 2009 - 00:10
Tough day today. Woke up from the strangest dream, feeling groggy and still tired.
I thought things were going to be okay because I'd made the decision that things were over between Jade and I. He's doing his best to sneak out of my life anyway, using excuse after excuse. Enough. Many of you who are my FB Friends noticed when I made the decision. (Some of you noticed right quick!!)
But today, I took off the ring. I've been wearing that ring for two years. I've always felt naked without it.
So, really bad morning ... fought with the depression, but it felt like I was struggling in a straight jacket in a dark room. Sat down and watched a couple movies ... and around noon, I managed to get enough interest in life to make something to eat at last. Made enough to cover two meal breaks at work too.
Got invited out to supper with my Aunt and came home with another full meal in a container. Felt better after too. Only a little smoked out. :)
I wish that Jade was my only trouble ... Took EI over two months to pay me ... and my plans to use it to pay the bills? Not gonna happen. My landlady freaked about the stains my parents left behind and she demanded that I pay my own deposit. So I wrote her a cheque ... even though I still hadn't paid rent yet at that point. Rent went through soon after and EI a week after that. So I've paid $1600 in the last couple of weeks ... and rent is due again right away. I'm going to be short for rent, and not able to pay ANY of the bills.
I'm starting to get the calls. I thought I'd left those behind.
I'll start making a few phone calls tomorrow morning ... hopefully I can get somewhere with them. Not sure what I'm going to do for extra cash though.
Something will come up though. I'll think of something. Everything will be alright.
I hope.
Sweet Dreams!
Tough day today. Woke up from the strangest dream, feeling groggy and still tired.
I thought things were going to be okay because I'd made the decision that things were over between Jade and I. He's doing his best to sneak out of my life anyway, using excuse after excuse. Enough. Many of you who are my FB Friends noticed when I made the decision. (Some of you noticed right quick!!)
But today, I took off the ring. I've been wearing that ring for two years. I've always felt naked without it.
So, really bad morning ... fought with the depression, but it felt like I was struggling in a straight jacket in a dark room. Sat down and watched a couple movies ... and around noon, I managed to get enough interest in life to make something to eat at last. Made enough to cover two meal breaks at work too.
Got invited out to supper with my Aunt and came home with another full meal in a container. Felt better after too. Only a little smoked out. :)
I wish that Jade was my only trouble ... Took EI over two months to pay me ... and my plans to use it to pay the bills? Not gonna happen. My landlady freaked about the stains my parents left behind and she demanded that I pay my own deposit. So I wrote her a cheque ... even though I still hadn't paid rent yet at that point. Rent went through soon after and EI a week after that. So I've paid $1600 in the last couple of weeks ... and rent is due again right away. I'm going to be short for rent, and not able to pay ANY of the bills.
I'm starting to get the calls. I thought I'd left those behind.
I'll start making a few phone calls tomorrow morning ... hopefully I can get somewhere with them. Not sure what I'm going to do for extra cash though.
Something will come up though. I'll think of something. Everything will be alright.
I hope.
Sweet Dreams!
Tuesday, June 02, 2009
It's Tuesday!
June 2, 2009 - 13:17
I feel good today. Not necessarily happier, but healthier, stronger. More energetic. Maybe because I laughed alot during my shift last night. Maybe because I'm finally getting enough sleep. It's certainly not because I'm financially sound! Could be the sunshine ... although I hope we get a good rain soon. My rain barrel is almost empty, and I'll have to start using city water soon to water my plants and my lawn.
My birthday is coming up ... I wonder if anybody will show up this year. I plan on baking a cake or something, just in case I have somebody to share it with. Maybe I'll set up a pot luck ... that would be nice, although I'd probably starve! LOL!
Had a couple of great days with Lavender and now that she's away on holiday again, I miss her. We've been doing crafts, going for walks, and having great talks ... and I finally feel like I'm getting some healing from those talks instead of venting a problem that won't go away. Maybe I was ready. Maybe it was the audience ... who knows?
I'm making great headway though. I can now picture myself having a pleasant conversation with my Mother-in-law. Granted, I have my bad days, and I backslide a little, but I'm getting better. And that's why I'm here, right?
Thought I was going to be getting a room-mate for a few months, at least, but that isn't going to happen after all. I have mixed emotions about it. I'm very glad that Greywhistle and Naomi are going to give things another try. I'm very sorry that I won't have the extra cash. I don't know whether I should be amused, or alarmed, that Naomi suddenly wants to try again AFTER she worked out her budget without Greywhistle's income added. Let's just say that I'm wary about this coincidence. Whether or not this was the catalyst, if it brings a good result, it's still a good thing.
I wonder if I should try to get my picture on a Jones soda ... and which flavour would I prefer it to be on?
Anyway, I'm off to do more things ... something to keep my energy up. I'm slowly losing weight now ... again ... let's see what I can do to not only keep up this direction, but to speed it up a smidge!
Sweet Dreams!
I feel good today. Not necessarily happier, but healthier, stronger. More energetic. Maybe because I laughed alot during my shift last night. Maybe because I'm finally getting enough sleep. It's certainly not because I'm financially sound! Could be the sunshine ... although I hope we get a good rain soon. My rain barrel is almost empty, and I'll have to start using city water soon to water my plants and my lawn.
My birthday is coming up ... I wonder if anybody will show up this year. I plan on baking a cake or something, just in case I have somebody to share it with. Maybe I'll set up a pot luck ... that would be nice, although I'd probably starve! LOL!
Had a couple of great days with Lavender and now that she's away on holiday again, I miss her. We've been doing crafts, going for walks, and having great talks ... and I finally feel like I'm getting some healing from those talks instead of venting a problem that won't go away. Maybe I was ready. Maybe it was the audience ... who knows?
I'm making great headway though. I can now picture myself having a pleasant conversation with my Mother-in-law. Granted, I have my bad days, and I backslide a little, but I'm getting better. And that's why I'm here, right?
Thought I was going to be getting a room-mate for a few months, at least, but that isn't going to happen after all. I have mixed emotions about it. I'm very glad that Greywhistle and Naomi are going to give things another try. I'm very sorry that I won't have the extra cash. I don't know whether I should be amused, or alarmed, that Naomi suddenly wants to try again AFTER she worked out her budget without Greywhistle's income added. Let's just say that I'm wary about this coincidence. Whether or not this was the catalyst, if it brings a good result, it's still a good thing.
I wonder if I should try to get my picture on a Jones soda ... and which flavour would I prefer it to be on?
Anyway, I'm off to do more things ... something to keep my energy up. I'm slowly losing weight now ... again ... let's see what I can do to not only keep up this direction, but to speed it up a smidge!
Sweet Dreams!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)