Hooked on a Feeling

December 15, 2009 - 18:39

I admit that I feel quite depressed lately. Abandonned. Like everybody is getting on with their lives and I'm not a part of it. Except maybe as a small thought ... a nudge. A blip on the screen.

Maybe it's just that it's Christmas. More than likely that's it. Maybe tonight I'll go through the decorations more thoroughly and find the twinkle lights ... and put them up in the windows. That might be nice. A bit if a pick me up. No tree, but I can set something up all the same if need be. If I had presents.

Got some cards mailed out. Almost got me in the mood. The snow was wonderful too, even if it only lasted a day. It's pouring rain right now.

I say it again. I live in Forks. I swear.

I feel slightly trapped here ... having to depend on my very kind neighbours for most of my needs because I don't have a vehicle, and still don't have a job. It's ... it's depressing. Demoralising.

I am getting small things accomplished. The house feels ... well, smoother. It flows. Ripley is starting to behave himself. He still has a couple bad habits ... like his begging ... but he seems to be getting happier. He's settling in. He's learned to share too. He gave Spot fleas.

Guess who Spot sleeps with?

I think that loneliness is the greatest factor here. I would have had the lights up sooner if I had somebody to help me with it. Somebody to laugh and giggle with and share a few mugs of hot chocolate with after. Somebody to TALK to!!

I'm tired of being alone.

Sweet Dreams ... they're all I have left.