Dedicated to One That I Love!

23:21

As per a personal request, the following song has been dedicated to Lynne. Here's lookin' at you, kid!

Carrot Juice is Murder
~by The Arrogant Worms~

Listen up, brothers and sisters,
Come hear my desperate tale!
I speak of our friends of nature
trapped in the dirt like a jail.
Vegetables live in oppression,
served on our tables each night.
This killing of veggies is madness!
I say we take up the fight!

Salads are only for murderers!
Cole Slaw's a fascist regime!
Don't think that they don't have feelings,
just cause a radish can't scream.

Chorus
I've heard the screams of the vegetables! (screams, screams, screams)
Watching their skins being peeled! (having their insides revealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy. (Burning off calories)
How do you think that feels? (Bet it hurts really bad)
Carrot juice constitutes murder! (And that's a real crime)
Greenhouses prisons for slaves! (Let my vegetables go)
It's time to stop all this gardening. (It's dirty as Hell)
Let's call a spade a spade. (is a spade, is a spade, is a spade, is a)

I saw a man eating celery,
so I beat him black and blue.
If he ever touches a sprout again,
I'll bite him clean in two!

I'm a political prisoner,
trapped in a windowless cage.
'Cause I stopped the slaughter of turnips
by killing five men in a rage!

I told the judge when he sentenced me:
This is my finest hour!
I'd kill those farmers again
just to save one more cauliflower.

(chorus)

How low as people do we dare to stoop,
Making young broccolis bleed in the soup?
Untie your beans,
Uncage your tomatoes
Let potted plants free,
Don't mash that potato!

(Spoken)No! Spare the spud!Eat a cow instead!

(Sung)I've heard the screams of the vegetables! (screams, screams, screams)
Watching their skins being peeled! (Fates in the stir-fry are sealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy. (You fat gourmet scum)
How do you think that feels? (Leave them out in the fields)
Carrot juice constitutes murder! (V8's genocide)
Greenhouses prisons for slaves! (Yes, your compost's a grave)
It's time to stop all this gardening. (Take up macrame)
Let's call a spade a spade. (is a spade is a spade is a spade)
is a spade is a spade is a...
Spade.

Power to the peas!
Give peas a chance...

All we are saying,
is give peas a chance.

This message is not necessarily a political statement of this writer and was put her at the request of another. No payments, bribes, etc. for this request were exchanged, nor does the writer benefit from it in anyway. Except maybe to pass on a smile, or generate a comment.

We now return you to our regular broadcasting.

No, that has nothing to do with the writer being a female, and if you call me a 'broad' again, I'll castrate you with my thumbnails.

Finally hit a ditch today. Had to wait two hours for Jade to get home and then it took about a half hour to get it out. I was supposed to go to wings tonight with Lynne, but called from the ditch and cancelled. Luckily it wasn't a deep ditch and it was close enough to home that I could walk the rest of the way with the groceries.

I thought the country was supposed to full of friendly folk. Do you know how many people drove past me and never offered to help? I wasn't in the ditch really deep, just stuck in the snow near the top. I tried to rock out, but just succeeded on twisting the vehicle around. Crazy. I can understand that they didn't have the tools to pull me, but nobody asked if I needed anything, if they could lend me a cell phone, or call for help for me. They just drove past and stared. Even in the city somebody will help to push!

Talk about disillusioned.

Anyway, I said I would show up next week. No, I don't care who's there. I'll show up anyway. Damn the torpedoes!

Outside of wiping out on the side of the road, everybody is sick here - everybody but me. It's really hit the in-laws especially hard so I've been doing all the cooking and cleaning. I don't mind.

That's my update for tonight. My punishment for landing in a ditch and making Jade help me out is that I have to call around to tire stores all day tomorrow and find winter tires. *sigh*
Meanwhile, I have every intention of taking him to bed and ripping his clothes off! ^_^!

Sweet Dreams!